Zhengzhou CWI

Today we visited the Zhengzhou Children’s Welfare Institute or CWI or orphanage (for the less politically correct).  This is where Patrick spent the past year of his life as well as the place John spent over a year of his life. We had not visited here on our previous trips to Zhengzhou.  As we drove up I was honestly shocked at the size of the facility.  From the outside it was a beautiful location with a soccer field surrounded by a track, multiple playground areas, and a large garden.  It was painted in bright colors and cleaner than I anticipated.  On the surface the inside was bright and cheery as well.  The kids were smiling.  Preschool was in full swing.  We were greeted by smiling workers who were all thrilled to see Patrick again.  He was in his carrier strapped to me so he felt pretty safe.  Lauren and I could tell he was nervous, but he did well throughout his visit.  Our first stop was the New Hope/Show Hope Special Care Center. This is home to about 80 of the babies under the care of Show Hope.  We visited Patrick’s room. His nannies were thrilled to see him.  We were greeted by the head nanny who got so excited not only to see Patrick, but also to see pictures of John.  She was ecstatic to see he was doing so well.  We also got to see Ednalyn, Patrick’s nurse, who has cared for him for quite a while now.   Before we left the Show Hope floor Ednalyn walked into a supply room.  Patrick immediately started smiling.  She returned with a handful of snacks for him.  Apparently these two have shared a few snacks throughout their time together. If anyone sponsors children through Show Hope, I can personally say that they are loved and well cared for in this facility

Later we visited Patrick’s preschool room.  His teacher was just as happy to see him as everyone else.  She insisted that I take him out of his carrier for pictures.  I was reluctant but went ahead.  Again he did great, but happily got back on my chest!!! We were told that he loved going to preschool, and I believe it.

It was great to see where two of my boys spent a great deal of their lives.  It was also great to know that neither of them are there any longer.  As we prepared to leave today we were met by a large group of kids going from one activity to another.  Most of these kids were older.  There were walkers, wheelchairs, and kids walking normally.  There was laughter, bickering, and lots of showing off for the camera.  One guy made sure he got a fist bump from each of us.  If we didn’t know better, we could have been in a normal school environment.  Sadly we do know better.  We were in an orphanage.  We were in the largest orphanage in Henan province.  Over 600 children call this place home.  That doesn’t include those who are in foster care in this city.  When the “school day” ends these kids don’t go home to happy families.  During holiday breaks this is still home.  These kids rarely see the outside of the orphanage gates.  A location similar to this is where Elisabeth spent the first 13 years of her life.  Some of these children will be adopted either domestically or internationally, but statistically speaking most of these children have no future.  They are considered “unlucky” by their country so jobs will be hard to come by once their days are over in the orphanage.  Life on the streets or in jail will be the most common outcome.  Open Christianity is illegal so there isn’t a church to step in for help.  It’s heartbreaking.  We can all talk about the statistics, but when you stand in a room surrounded by real live children, it’s almost unbearable.    I wish I could transport anyone who asks me why we chose to adopt to that room.  No further explanation would be needed.  I wouldn’t have to explain why our hearts long to bring even more home.  I’m thankful that God chose my family to remove at least 4 children from that room.  I pray that someone, somewhere is answering God’s call to remove even more.

Panoramic view from inside the orphanage

 

 

Ednalyn

Patrick's bed

Us with the head nanny and Ednalyn

Patick's preschool room

Door artwork

In Mama's arms

 

The fist bumper

Selfie with a new friend

A day at the Big House

It seems like each adoption trip I write this same blog, but I just can’t help myself.  Yesterday, was one of the days I look forward to more than almost anything else on our trip. We spent the day at Maria’s Big House of Hope with the people who seem like a second family to us.  For those who don’t know, all three of our boys have been taken care of by the New Hope/Show Hope organization.  John and Davidson were both at Maria’s while Patrick spent time at two of the other special care centers.  Currently this organization is taking care of around 300 sick babies in 5 different locations with a 6^th opening soon.  They coordinate surgeries, surgical teams from the US, preschool for the kids, daily care for the children, Show Hope trips for those who desire to come visit, and innumerable other activities all aimed at taking care of these precious babies who are waiting for a family. All of that is just what they are doing in China.  They have other ministries all over the world. It is an amazing organization that I feel fortunate to have seen close up.

Yesterday was a blast.  When we walked in, the Martin family, the Renich family, and the nursing staff were having their weekly fellowship time.  We joined in the singing and listened as the group shared about being God’s light everywhere we go.  I can’t think of a more appropriate message. Soon after fellowship we shared lunch, and then Patrick got a checkup from Dr. Steve who will always be my boy’s “doctor.”  Without the care they received from him I don’t want to think about where they might be.   I also must mention that two of the nurses, Jonah and Lily, have cared for all three of my boys at some point during their time in China. Lauren and I tear up just thinking about it.  We are so glad that we get to visit with them and thank them in person for the work that they have done.  We love to share current pictures so that they get to see what those crazy boys are up to now!!! Later in the day we went with the staff from room to room singing Christmas carols.  The nannies may not have known the words but they smiled along with us as the children danced along to the music.  One guy grabbed Maggie and danced with her.  He wanted more music so he could keep dancing!!  The nannies were give a small gift as appreciation for the work they do.  It was a wonderful picture of God’s love being shared across a language and cultural barrier.

I won’t deny the possibility that three of the Ayres were taking pictures of children wondering if God will call us to walk down the adoption road again.  Although I think this is our last adoption trip, I know better than to say never!! As always the day passed too quickly, and before we knew it, it was time to return to our hotel room.  It was a blast getting to catch up with everyone, and see again just how God is working in a “small” town in China.  Through tears we all hugged and said our goodbyes, looking anxiously to the day we will get to visit again. 

***Warning***It’s about to get a little preachy.  You may want to stop now.***

I truly don’t have the words to express my appreciation for the work that New Hope/Show Hope does every day across the globe.  However, as wonderful as Maria’s Big House of Hope is, places like it are only necessary because we live in a broken and sinful world.  Also, despite the wonderful, loving care that these children receive, MBHOH is a temporary home.  These children still need families.  They still need a mama to hold them through the pain following a surgery.  They still need a father who treats them like a king or a queen.  They still need brothers and sisters to grow up with.  I pray that someone today sees a picture, hears a sermon, or reads a piece of scripture (or maybe even reads this goofy blog) that opens their eyes to adoption.  It is life changing…in a big way.  I have a family of 10 to prove it!!!

Childrens Fellowship

Love, Love, Love

 

Dancing

Caroling

More dancing

Mama and her boy

preciousness

 

Well day 1 in Zhengzhou is in the books.  After 34 hours of travel we finally made it to our hotel.   Thankfully the flights were fairly uneventful.  I can’t say that for the rest of the afternoon.  We arrived to our hotel just before 1 pm with what seemed to be just enough time to pull some clothes out of the luggage, shower, and leave to get Patrick.  As Lauren and I were organizing the suitcases, Maggie took a shower without a problem.  When it was time for Lauren to shower apparently the cold water quit working.  5 minutes later the hot water quit working.  After freaking out a little, and going to the front desk to check into things, I learned that a construction project down the street had all water to the hotel turned off.  This is my 5^th trip to China so I must say I wasn’t very surprised.  Shower or no shower, the day went on, and with two days of travel behind us we went to get Patrick. 

“Gotcha Day” at the registration office was as exciting as it has been for each of the other children.  Anxiously awaiting for the orphanage director to walk in with our child, we were overjoyed when they finally brought him in. Patrick, not so much.  He got hugs and kisses from everyone of course.  He cried, but honestly not as much as you might expect from a 3 year old being handed over to someone he doesn’t know.  After a pack of cookies and a little candy he was laughing and smiling for the camera just as we remembered him from our 2 weeks at New Hope in Beijing. 

 The rest of the day was filled with lots of laughing, playing, and of course a little birthday cake.  Our sweet guides from CCAI, brought him a birthday cake and sang happy birthday to him.  He smiled as they sang and then ate his cake, Lauren’s cake, and pretty much anyone else’s who would give him a bite.    He got his bath, and honestly went to sleep much more easily than I had expected.  I guess getting adopted wears a little guy out.  I know the paper work, travel, and anticipation definitely wore the rest of us out.  We could barely stay awake long enough to walk to the bed!!! I look forward to the next few days of learning all about Patrick, enjoying a little sightseeing in China, and visiting with the friends we have here.  I pray that everyone reading this had a very Merry Christmas Day! It certainly was a different one for us, but a wonderful day for sure!!!

Merry Christmas

So since were are headed to China I guess it is time to start blogging about Patrick Shepherd Ayres’ adoption.  Better late than never I guess.  What? On a plane? On Dec 23?  I thought you weren’t going until January.  Yeah.  That’s what we thought too.  But as I have said once or twice, God had a different plan. 

So for those of you who are out of the loop, we are in the process of adopting our 4^th child in 2 years, and 3^rd boy born in 2011.  Zheng Yun Qi, soon to be Patrick Shepherd Ayres, is in Zhengzhou, Henan, China.  We were blessed to have met him when we spent two weeks caring for the babies of New Hope Foster Home in Beijing during August 2013.  At the time we were in the process of adopting John, and vowed not to fall in love with another baby.  Of course we fell in love with 50 but come on, another adoption.  7 kids is plenty isn’t it?  Apparently not. It didn’t take us long to fall in love with Qi Qi and despite leaving Beijing feeling sure we would never see him again, he was never far from our thoughts and prayers, especially for Janie.  Janie spent months writing about him in her school journal, praying for him, asking if we could adopt him, asking if she could just marry him!!! (On a side note, when teaching your kids about the power of prayer, understand that they can and will use that power in a mighty way.  Oh to have the simple faith of a child).  I was resistant despite the gentle nudging of the Holy Spirit, but the women in my life kept praying.  In my eyes there was one big problem.  Qi Qi has a VERY complex heart defect that I wasn’t ready to take on.  How would we stay in the hospital with him while he has a major heart operation while 7 other children stayed at home?  What if he didn’t live?  How could we put ourselves through that?   So I asked Lauren those specific questions.  Her answer, we are ready, and if he lives 2 weeks or 100 years at least it will be with a family.  How could I say no to that?  At that point the paper chase began.  We were matched to Qi Qi in September and prayed to have him by his birthday, Christmas Day.

Fast forward to December. Based on our previous adoptions, our paperwork was coming together for an early December trip to China.  Maybe even there and home before Christmas.  But it seems every step took extra days.  Extra days turned into extra weeks, and before we knew it early December was looking like mid January.  The last day to have a gotcha day in China this year would be December 22.  The Chinese authority decided to shut down Dec 27 to January 5.  We still had hope to fly out on Dec 19 to get our son just before the shutdown.  Unfortunately, we got closer and closer to that day and still weren’t issued our travel approval. We had to accept that Patrick would be spending his birthday in China and we would be in Alabama

So how is it that we are travelling to China on December the 23, a day after the deadline?  All I can say is God had a different plan.  On Saturday we were preparing for some more Christmas fun and my phone rang.  On the other end of the line was Joshua Zhong, the founder of CCAI, our adoption agency.  December 20 was Elisabeth’s gotcha day so we thought he must have been calling to see how she was doing.  He wasn’t.  He quickly started telling me a story that would turn our next few days into a whirlwind.  Apparently, Henan province is in line to have a record number of adoptions in 2014.  They were a few short of their number, and called Joshua to see if he knew of any families who could come quickly and adopt on or before December 26, one day before the shutdown.  He wanted to know if we were interested.  Of course we said yes.  We had four days to pack for a 2-3 week trip to China, rearrange our Christmas plans, book tickets, and arrange my work schedule.  Oh yeah, he also said that this wouldn’t be 100% sure until Sunday night or Monday morning.  I couldn’t book tickets until Monday.  So let the games begin.  Lauren started packing for herself, Janie, Maggie, and Patrick.  I started looking for flights and getting the office taken care of.  We received official word just after midnight Sunday.  I said 4 days didn’t I?  Well there was no flight plan available for Christmas Eve that would allow us to arrive on time to Zhengzhou, so here we are.  Three days after the initial phone call, and 1 day after booking tickets I’m waiting to board a plane to Korea then connect to Zhengzhou.  We managed to fit in a little Christmas fun with the kids before leaving today. 

God had (and always has) a different and better plan.  If we would have received travel approval the week we anticipated we would have booked flights for January.  If those small delays wouldn’t have happened we would not have seen God throw the mountain that was blocking our way into the sea.  All along we were frustrated because things weren’t moving at least from our perspective.  All the while God was putting all the pieces in to place. 

Didn’t I mention the prayers of a child before? Janie’s prayer and the top request on her Christmas list was to have Patrick before Christmas Day.  Because we couldn’t fly out on Christmas Eve, we will land in Zhengzhou at 11 am on Christmas Day, quickly stop by our hotel, then go to the registration office to receive Patrick.  We will be without real sleep for 48 hours, without a shower for the same, surviving on snacks and airplane food, but I can’t think of anywhere I would rather be.  Merry Christmas to us, Ayres party of 10!!

The Women in My Life

It's been a pretty exciting day in the Ayres house.  Many have already heard that Elisabeth got her Learner's Permit today.  I'm not sure how ready we are for her to be behind the wheel, but seeing her smile and hearing her voice made me fill up with pride.  A permit may not be the biggest accomplishment for most, but it is just one of many huge milestones that she has had in her short time with us.  She landed in the US on January 6, 2013 knowing very few words in English, and having no idea what life here would be like.  It was not all rosy in the beginning, but now Elisabeth has gained the legal right to drive a car, she has completed two semesters of ESL with all As, she has performed in her first dance recital, learned to swim, learned to ride a bike, volunteered in a Chinese orphanage, and most importantly accepted Jesus Christ as her Savior.  I am amazed at how God has changed her heart, and how He has blessed our family through her.  Who knows what the future holds for Elisabeth, but with her drive and her determination, I look forward to having a front row seat.  The front seat in the car, not so much!!

While reflecting on Elisabeth's accomplishments I couldn't help but think of the other women and young ladies that God has placed in my life.  I could consider myself overly blessed to only have one of them, but God saw fit to give me all five. I hope I never go a day without thanking God for each of them, and the ways they bring joy to me and many others. 

People ask me every day, "How does Lauren do it?"  My answer, "I don't know."  She maintains a household, homeschools our children, runs a home based business, counsels with families all over the country who have adopted teenagers or toddlers, to share in their joy or to encourage them in their difficulties, and puts up with me!  That is a full time job, and then some.  Before we had children, she influenced other's children through her kindergarten class.  Last night she was reminded of just how much influence she had.  She received a message on Facebook from someone who wasn't one of her "Facebook friends".  In the message was a picture from her first kindergarten class.  That message came from a Mom of a student in that class.  He is now 22 years old, and very accomplished in his field.  The next thing I know Lauren is on the phone with a student she taught 17 years ago, reliving kindergarten and catching up on all that has happened in his life since.  He credits Lauren with his love of learning, and thanked her for being such a huge influence in his life.  I might think this was strange if it didn't happen several times a year.  A lot has changed since Maggie was born, and Lauren left the classroom, but it amazes me to see that God still uses her to shape the hearts and minds that she taught so many years ago.  I have no doubt that my children have the best teacher they can possibly have.

Our second oldest daughter, Maggie is quite a special young lady too.  Maggie has been able to travel to China with us twice.  Spending time with the babies there has opened up Maggie's heart for vulnerable children.  She spent countless hours crocheting slippers so that the nannies in the orphanage would have comfortable feet while they work. She is currently learning Mandarin, IN HER SPARE TIME!!  She is currently half way through Rosetta Stone, and last summer she was able to carry on limited conversation with the staff of the orphanage in which we worked.  She has always been a stubborn, determined child, and her attitude wasn't always ideal as a baby and toddler.  Now it is serving her well in everything she does.  She hopes to live in China one day, and work with orphaned children.  As with Elisabeth, I can't wait to watch!

Rebecca is my nurturing child.  She is in the middle and fills that role perfectly.  She has travelled to China with us three times, and would hop on a plane again at a moment's notice! She is not so young that she can't participate in youth activities with her older sisters, but not too old that she can't play with Janie and the younger boys.  She realizes when Lauren and I are busy or stressed, and the next thing we know, she will come down the stairs holding the little boys, bathed and in PJs.  This summer she has made a weekly meal plan, prepared the grocery list, and helped prepare lunch for everyone.  Since I am gone all day, I know this is a great help to Lauren.  I must say that she will make a wonderful wife and mother some day.  I still enjoy her being my little girl, so I'm not ready to think about that any time soon.

What can I say about Janie?  Janie has also gotten to travel to China with us twice, and I never realized how much those trips would mean to her.  Not a day goes by, that she doesn't want to talk about parts of our trips.  One particular child has been the topic of her prayers since last summer.  QiQi. (Pronounced Chi Chi).  QiQi is a little boy with a major heart defect, who captured all of our hearts, but most of all Janie.  She prays for him multiple times a day, and writes about him in her journal often.  She wants him to be her brother more than anything in the world.  Recently she told me, "If QiQi can't be my brother, I'm just going to have to marry him!"  I pray that her young heart will stay that committed to loving others, particularly the "least of these." 

There are many other women who have had huge influences in my life, but I have to stop sometime or the three of you that are reading this will stop! Many people assumed that Lauren and I stopped having biological children because we finally had a boy.   While I am so thankful for Porter, DD, and John, if we had been blessed with nothing but girls, I would never consider my life or my family incomplete.   I can't help but be saddened by the families in China, who are limited to one child, and who feel that a boy is the only option.  So many of these fathers will never get to experience the joy of having wonderful, loving, Godly women in their lives.  I thank God everyday that I'm not missing out on that experience.   

The road ahead

Seems like the first line in every blog that I write is the same.  It's been a while, but.... So I guess it's been a while.  We have been home with John, our seventh and youngest child since March.  Its been great, and busy, and fun, and hectic, and, oh well I guess you get the picture.  We have been to doctors to see if John needs anything done to his curvy, crooked back.  He has multiple problems, but doesn't need surgery at this time.  We took our first family vacation as a family of 7.  I'm not sure Destin will ever be the same, but we had a blast.  As a word of advice, if you see a big family getting out of their 12 passenger van headed to dinner, it is not okay to walk past, back up, and snap a pic with your phone.  Avoid the temptation!!!  We are just your average multiethnic family of nine in a big 12 passenger van.  Nothing to see here.  Overall everyone is content.  All of the kids get along well together, and absolutely love being in a big family.  That don't see life as strange, or weird, or different.  To them it is just life, and Lauren and I couldn't be more thankful.

So when I post a blog it seems like there is always some big announcement coming.  I will go ahead and say that we have been working on a few things, but no big announcement today.  We are often asked if we are finished adopting.  "Are you finished?"  "Is this the last one?" My answer.  I don't know.  We seek God's guidance in every decision, and if He sees fit to call us to adopt again we will follow that call.  Yes that would be 8 children, but God doesn't call us to something, and not equip us right?  Through our adoption process, however, God has definitely shown us the needs of the fatherless. He has also created in us a desire to do what we can to meet the needs that we can.  We have been praying for God to reveal how He wants to use our heart's desire, and He has been faithful to answer those prayers.

Through a series of very interesting circumstances that only God could have orchestrated, we have been made aware of a children's home in India that is in need of support.  India?  What?  God I only know about China.  Remember, 4 trips, 3 adoptions.  God has a way of working that way.  We spent a weekend recently with the family that runs the home, and learned of their most pressing needs.  They will soon be getting 7 new children, and among other things need new clothing for school, new sponsorshipes, and some new appliances to meet the daily needs of the kids.  The vision of the missionary family is amazing.  They feel that the children to whom they minister   are the next generation of missionaries to the villages of India.  They do so much more than meet the daily physical needs.  They also work to meet their spiritual needs. After much prayer, Lauren and I feel God leading us to form a new non-profit organization to begin supporting this home, and as things grow, find other children's homes to support.  The vision that God has given me is for this organization to be a means for individual churches and individual believers, to carry out God's desire for us to "look after orphans in their distress."

So what next?  We have some ideas, but we first are seeking God's plan so that He will be glorified in the work being done.  I ask that anyone reading this would join us in prayer.  If this is something you think you or your church would be interseted in, contact me.  I would love to discuss more of the details with you. I find that every time I discuss the work with someone, a new idea or an excellent word of advice is given.  "Iron sharpens iron," right?  The future is always exciting when seeking to do the work of our amazing Lord.

The End?

As we sit here on our last night in China, it seems bittersweet.  Certainly we are ready to get back to the other kids, family and friends, the comforts of home, clean water, our personal bus, and our very own washer and dryer.  But our time here is special too.  We have gotten so close to the families in our travel group.  Adoption brings families together in more ways than one.  We have also been able to explore the country in which three of our children were born.  We have been here four times in the last 18 months, and everytime when we left we knew that we would be back.  This time is different.  We don't have an expected return date, and in some ways it feels like the end.  We now have 7 kids, and we haven't quite figured out how to manage all of them yet.  Although we never will rule out another adoption, right now it doesn't seem realistic. (Not that 7 kids is very a normal either).  We also might have the opportunity to serve in an orphanage here, but getting out of the country for a couple of weeks isn't going to come easily in a house of 9. Adopting, working in orphanages, following the adoption stories of many families and children, and walking alongside the people of China changes you.  It changes your heart.  It makes you want to do more.  It makes you want to pray for the hearts of the people, and for the lives of the orphan.  It makes you want to wrap every orphan in your arms, and bring them to a loving home.  It makes you want to encourage others to adopt. It makes you want to support organizations like New Hope, Love Without Boundaries, Show Hope, CCAI, Lifeline, and New Day.  It makes you want to lift up workers like Joyce and Robin Hill, Steve and Laura Martin, Amy Eldridge, Joshua Zhong, and countless others who have given their lives for "the least of these." My heart longs to do more.  I guess that's why tonight I am glad to be going home, but sad to be leaving at the same time.  

I'm thankful tonight that God has entrusted 7 of His precious children to Lauren and me.  I am glad that he provided 3 of those children through adoption.  It allows me to feel a glimpse of how He felt when he adopted me into His family, and as I have said before that feeling is pretty great.  The journey that we have been on has been wonderful despite all of the ups and downs.  If God is closing a chapter in our lives, I know he will soon open another one.  2 years ago I had no idea the road that we would travel.  2 years from now I will probably be saying the same thing.  That's the wonderful part of following a living, breathing God.  You never know what tomorrow holds, but you always know that He holds you in His hand.  

Early tomorrow morning we begin our 24 hour trip home.  We ask that you continue to pray for us as we travel.  There are so many of you who have supported us every step of the way and to all of you we are eternally grateful. I don't have any pictures to post tonight, but for those of you who want to catch the live show, we will land in Birmingham at 4:45 pm Friday.  We would love to have Jian Xiang welcomed home by a crowd of family and friends. 

One week down

Although its hard to believe, our first week in China has passed as we travelled from Zhengzhou to Guangzhou today. In Zhengzhou we received John's Chinese passport.   Here in Guangzhou we will get his medical exam and his US visa.  Other than 3 of us getting a a stomach bug which ruined a few days, our time in Zhengzhou was a lot of fun.  We made several trips to Walmart, sampled a good bit of the local cuisine, and played a lot around the room and hotel. 

We were able to visit Maria's Big House of Hope in Luoyang.  Both John and Davidson spent the first part of their lives in Maria's receiving the loving care of the staff, nurses, and of course Dr. Steve Martin.  We are so thankful anytime we get to visit the Martin family.  Janie and Rebecca played with the Martin children like they have been lifelong friends, and Lauren, Laura, Steve, and I join in conversation seemingly where we left off this summer when we spent time together in Beijing. This trip we were also able to meet the Renich family, Nate, Vicki, and the boys.  They are the newest addition to the Maria's family. They live in Luoyang, near Maria's, and do...well it seems like a little bit of everything there!!!  While there it seems like we are home, I guess because it will always be our John and Davidson's first home, and we will always be indebted to Steve, the ayis (nannys), and New Hope Foundation for giving life to two of our sons. 

Before going to Maria's, Lauren asked for updated pictures of other Maria's babies that are now with their forever families. She shared those pics with the ayis in each of the rooms.  You would have thought she gave them all gold coins they were so excited.  These ladies put their lives into caring for these sick babies, and after  the babies leave they almost never get to see what happens to them.  It was a special time for sure.  I think the best part, however, was that John wanted only his Mama while we were there.  No one  else could even get close, not even his favorite Ayi. 

There were plenty of firsts this week too.  A first bath in a hotel bath tub (or probably any tub for that matter), a first ride on an amusement park style ride, a first airplane ride, and of course a first trip to McDonalds. And of course, the first time to be with his family. The way this boy likes to eat, there will probably be  many more in his future.  

Below are some pics of all of the fun...